Shelley didn't take it too badly when Lisa came out of the closet in the 80s; Lisa wasn't too upset when Shelley finally divorced her husband, Lisa's father; and in the early 90s Shelley was thrilled to hear that she would have a granddaughter through the magic of artificial insemination. The two had a history of sharing personal information, but even so, the question that Shelley was asking Lisa here and now in 1999 was still unthinkable, at least to Lisa.

"You want to WHAT?" Lisa blurted, mouth open, eyes wide.

"Jesus, Lisa, calm down," Shelley said, laughing. "It's not like you haven't done this before."

"I know, Mom, but -- my God, after all these years, you're telling me that you have a crush on Belinda -- and you want to ... to ... ACT on it?"

Belinda was Shelley's best friend and it would have been easy for any outsider to see why Shelley was having feelings for her. Belinda was tall, lithe, sparkling, tanned, and gorgeous. Shelley had been friends with Belinda for years -- since Lisa's childhood.

"Well, Lisa, I thought you could give me some advice, here. You ARE the lesbian of the family, after all."

Both women laughed at that. It was true, Lisa was the only openly gay person in the whole family. Her cousin Paula was a lesbian, and her elderly great-uncle Jonathan was gay too, but both relatives were deeply in the closet, especially Uncle Jonathan who had been married to the same devout Baptist woman for decades.

"God, Mom, it's still a shock, though, you know? To have your own Mom ask you about this stuff!"

"Don't you remember when you asked ME about this stuff?"

Lisa was taken aback for a second. "Actually, I forgot!"

"I remember the day well ... I had just caught you and little Linda Aaron from down the street playing grab-ass in the basement, and I sent her home and gave you a little talk about the birds and the bees." "You mean, the birds and the birds."

Shelley smiled at her daughter. "Yes, exactly. Do you remember what I told you?"

"God, Mom, you practically told me how to be a lesbian!"

"Oh please! All I did was tell you what adult lesbians did in bed. Oh, it was so funny, watching your face turn pink! And the way you kept wiggling around!"

"It was embarrassing!"

"Oh, come on, Lisa! Don't tell me you didn't go try it out with Linda first chance you got!"

Lisa's sudden guilty expression caused her mother to burst into laughter. Unable to help herself, Lisa joined in. Soon both women were wiping tears from their eyes and struggling to stop giggling.

"OK, OK, so I did run out and try it all. It's your fault, though!"

"Well ... I wanted to make sure that was what you wanted. I mean, let's say you did go through with it and you hated it. Then you'd know, right?"

"That's kind of a bizarre way to teach your kids about sex!"

"It worked, didn't it?"

"Would you have given me similar advice if Linda had been a BOY?"

"No, of course not. Boys can get you pregnant, girls can't."

"Hey Mom, don't let May-May hear you say that."

May-May was Lisa's pet name for May, her beautiful eight-year-old daughter. May-May knew and understood that she was the product of artificial insemination.

"You know what I mean, Lisa."

Lisa shrugged. "Well, OK. I guess it all worked out in the end."

They both sipped their coffee for a moment, then Shelley said: "So, about my question ..."

Lisa snorted, then giggled and shook her head. Shelley chuckled a bit too, but reached over and laid her hand on her daughter's arm. "Seriously, Lisa. I'm interested. What do I do?"

Just then Lisa got a very weird feeling, as if her own mother was coming on to HER, instead of talking about Belinda. A warm tingle trickled through her loins as she struggled to recover from the naughty thought.

"Uh, well ... that's a good question, Mom. Uh, maybe you should just be forthright with her?" "Well, that's not very romantic, is it?" Shelley said, pursing her lips. "Besides, if I just came out and -- and TOLD her, Belinda would probably just tell me it was OK and then ignore it like she does with all the men who chase her!"

"So you think you need to, sort of, uh ... "

"I want to seduce her," Shelley stated flatly..........(cont)