Black Woman: "That's right, kids. Being on a network that only toddlers and perverts watch, make our target groups pretty limited. And toddlers outgrow us, so I hope you've put together a show that would appeal to our pedophile fans."

Unknown Boy: We sure have!

Superfluous Girl: Today all of the boys, and the rest of the girls that are left, are gonna turn the show over to our three prettiest cast members!"

Unimportant Boy: "Yeah! Alexandra, Linsey, and Megan!"

White Man: "Oh? What're they gonna do?"

Needless Girl: "Well, we've got Denise Austin backstage!"

Unknown Boy: "And she's staying for the whole show!"

Black Woman: "And?"

Superfluous Girl: "And she's gonna teach Alex, Linsey, and Megan all about.. you know.. SEX!"

Black Woman: "That's a very grown-up thing to learn. Are they prepared for it?"

Unimportant Boy: "Ms. Austin's been working with them for the last two weeks..."

Superfluous Girl: "They've been watching all kinds of dirty movies, and looking through filthy magazines..."

Unknown Boy: "And today, right here on our special show, they get to lose their virginity!"

Needless Girl: "They're really lucky!"

Unimportant Boy: "But we get to watch!"

White Man: "And what are the rest of you gonna be doing?"

Superfluous Girl: "We're gonna be running all the cameras, making sure we get all the right angles and proper close- ups!"

Unknown Boy: "And taking care of sound, lighting..."

Needless Girl: "Make-up, wardrobe..."

Unimportant Boy: "And we get to watch!" (one-track mind)

Black Woman: (Smiling.) "Okay kids. Remember that today's special episode is ninety minutes long, so..."

White Man: "You be sure to make it last! And none of them damn song clips!"

Unknown Boy: "Don't worry sir, we've got it all figured out!"

Unimportant Boy: "Ms. Austin said that she'd take care of her part, and we're all ready with ours."

Black Woman: "Ok, kids. Make sure that you do everything Denise tells you to do!"

White Man: "Alright, children. Let's get this show on the road!"

(Scene switch)

Cameras on what I believe is called the control room. (The table has microphones, monitors, many miscellaneous levers and buttons.) There are three kids seated behind the control table, all with headsets on.

Unnecessary Boy: "I sure am excited about today's show!"

Insignificant Black Girl: "Me, too! I've never seen a man's thing before!"

Megan: "It's showtime!" (God, she's cute!).....(cont)